So I just ate about six chocolate covered strawberries in reaction to the fasting that went on in my household this past weekend while I was trying to fit my almost thirty-nine year old, has birthed two children and have the hips to prove it, ass into a pair of skinny jeans that I JUST NOW realized were meant for GIRLS!
Not Women, because I just pulled up their website and it says GIRLS! Girls and Boys. Not Men and Women.
It started the other day when I googled 'most popular skinny jean', and came up with these all over the results page...
They were Bullhead Solana Extreme Skinny Jeans by Pac Sun. I had never even heard of Pac Sun but checked for locations and saw that they had one in my local mall. Lucky me.
So...Saturday morning I dragged Drew and the girls to the mall so I could fulfill my quest for the perfect skinny jean to add to my collection of every other type of jean imaginable.
I l-o-n-g to wear skinny jeans with my Frye boots, or my high-heeled boots or my rugged flat boots, or my sexy sling backs, or my ballet flats.....as you can see the list of acceptable shoes paired with a hot pair of skinny jeans is never ending.
I mean seriously, of all the jeans I own, I have never owned a pair of skinny ones.
So while Drew was being tortured by the girls in Claire's who were furiously looking for leg warmers {don't ask}, I was in Pac Sun with a fourteen year old salesgirl telling me that if I could at least zip the jeans up all the way, then shazam!, it was the right size.
I wanted to go the next size up, but she insisted that they stretch so much you should buy one size smaller than you normally would. She kept flipping her hair back and forth EXACTLY the way a fourteen year old does and assured me that we would find the right fit.
So I bought this dark denim color pictured above, along with a black pair for $55. I was able to wear them for one whole hour on Saturday until my legs lost all feeling and went numb but averaged about five hours on Sunday.
I guess that means they are stretching and aside from my ass falling out every time I bent over to pick something up, they were actually quite nice. Whether I end up wearing them or not, only time will tell but they are pretty cool jeans for two pairs at $55.
I may have to investigate an alternate style though, one that goes up a few more inches in the back to accommodate a butt bigger than a pre-period teenage girl. Oh, and I can't forget about the containment of the muffin top.


