A friend of mine sent me a bit about contrarian academic Stanley Fish's New York Times blog, where he discussed the phrases currently in our modern language that he finds most annoying, although they do serve a certain function in society therefore making them necessary, such as "can I put you on hold," "sold out" and "to be continued".
The phrases listed below are the ones that he finds unnecessary and insufferable and I myself agree but still use them all the time.
He claims the following phrases not only 'grate on the ear' but also 'deliver no vital information at all'.
He sounds like such a snob.
And the first one is...
It is what it is....
Dude says: This newcomer is the epitome of an ear-grating phrase that means nothing.
I say: I say this ALL the time when I don't know what else to say. Like.. "yeah that sucks, it is what it is..."
It's all good....
Dude says: The inclusion of "all" only accentuates how much you don't mean what you are saying.
I say: This I don't say unless I am trying to be down with the hommies, homies, homeis? Is that how you spell it, or is it homies with only one m?
To be honest...
Dude says: Not only is this phrase usually followed by something best left unsaid, but it also implies everything else you say is dishonest.
I say: Couldn't have said it better myself and I couldn't agree more, plus the way he say it makes me laugh.
No offense...
Dude says: A phrase even more insincere than it is superfluous.
I say: I never say this one because no matter what you say after 'no offense' it is usually still offensive.
Whatever...
Dude says: In a recent survey, 47 percent of Americans chose this word compound as the most annoying phrase of all. Meaning you have permission to smack anyone who uses it and isn't a 12-year-old girl. (And it's a close call on smacking any 12-year-old girl who uses the "w" word.)
I say: I would tend to agree although AGAIN, use it all the time. Mostly in text messages when I am mad.
Don't get me wrong...
Dude says: Isn't it implicit in most human communication that your intention is always to be correctly understood?"
I say: Yeah, I am with you on that one. I still say it though.
With all due respect...
Dude says: Really?
I say: Another one I never use, it just sounds stupid.
Everything happens for a reason..
Dude says: A completely worthless utterance that probably doubles as a vicious taunt to those who have undergone terrible hardships.
I say: WHAT? NO, we can't say this one...I built my life around this, I don't understand??
Share...
Dude says: At the end of the day you will be preparing for bed.
I say: (Scrunched up confused face), I don't get it. What does he mean
Going forward...
Dude says: Saying this is like announcing your next footstep.
I say: I ALWAYS say this after a fight with Drew.
And then a random joke because hey, why not? I already stole others people's material for this post so why not steal one more and what woman in her right mind can't relate to this...
A woman was sitting at a bar enjoying an after work cocktail with her girlfriends when John, a tall, exceptionally handsome, extremely sexy, middle-aged man entered. He was so striking that the woman could not take her eyes off him.
The young-at-heart man noticed her overly attentive stare and walked directly toward her (as all men will). Before she could offer her apologies for staring so rudely, he leaned over and whispered to her, "I'll do anything, absolutely anything, that you want me to do, no matter how kinky, for $20.00 on one condition".
Flabbergasted, the woman asked what the condition was. The man replied, "You have to tell me what you want me to do in just three words."
The woman considered his proposition for a moment, and then slowly removed a $20 bill from her purse, which she pressed into the man's hand along with her address. She looked deeply into his eyes, and slowly and meaningfully said...
"Clean my house."
